Sunday Funday

by Mandy

You're probably not quite sure what this picture is. Let me clarify. This is 16 pounds of ham. It is 16 pounds that I am no longer carrying around on my body.

When I started this blog with Sandy, I'd already lost about 10 pounds. As you know, I've had a hard time staying motivated over the past few weeks, so I kept yo yo-ing back and forth between those ten pounds.

I've found my 'zone' now. With my mother finally called back to work, she's feeling more motivated. With my trip in July creeping closer, I'm feeling more motivated. I think the spring weather has been helping too. It's easier to go outside for a walk when it's bright and sunny and warm.

Last Wednesday when I got on the scale...I'd finally recovered the 10 pounds I'd originally lost. I tried to look at that as making myself a fresh slate. It was time to stop harping on the days I didn't eat well...and look ahead with optimism and strength.

I've been exercising like a fiend. Now I'm sure I didn't actually lose 4 pounds between Wed and Today. Although maybe I did...with the atrocious amount of calories I've been eating, I'm sure just cutting back on the calories did a number on my metabolism. Either way, I must say...looking down at the scale and seeing 276 instead of 280 made me so excited.

My mom and I have been talking about Easter. We've decided that each of us can pick out 2 reasonably sized treats for Easter...food or nonfood. I think it's better that way. Sometimes we'll set aside 'cheat days' once a month...and when that day comes up...we don't actually want anything but feel pressured to take advantage of the opportunity. I think that leaves us feeling conflicted and leads us to eat more. So this year....I could decide to get two small cadbury eggs, or one cadbury egg and a book, or two books.

This will be a step, I hope...in learning not to reward myself with food so much.

Thank you so much for reading this blog. Your support means the world to Sandy and I.

Happy Hump/Weigh Day!

By Mandy

It is Hump Wednesday! It's also weigh day...because I forgot to do it yesterday. This week I am down by 2 pounds! Progress is progress and I'm happy for any number as long as it doesn't have a plus sign next to it.

I wasn't perfect over the past week. On Friday I had to buy lunch. But instead of going for fatty burgers or pizza, I brought my v8 with me, along with carrot chips and turkey pepperoni...and got sushi. By and by sushi is not the best thing around, but I got the veggie roll, so the worst thing about it was the rice. And melded together with the stuff I brought from home I felt pretty good about it.

Yesterday was a bit trickier. A friend wanted to hang out, but we really didn't have any money to go anywhere or do anything. So we sat at her house and watched a few movies. Eventually dinnertime came around and we were both hungry. Her house...is not diet friendly. I didn't want to cut our day short just to go home and eat. So we ended up having grilled cheese sandwiches. Now she likes to make them with a lot of cheese and with butter spread across the top and bottom of the bread so that it browns in the pan. I told her not to use butter for mine, put a little less cheese on it...and that was pretty much the best I could do. I said no to the chips she offered me later on, and the minute I got home I tried to offset the sandwich with a nice glass of V8 and an apple.

Working your diet around your friends can sometimes be hard. You don't want to be inconvenient, and you certainly don't want to make them feel bad for not eating what you are.

All in all however, I'm feeling pretty successful.

It's Weigh Day

By Sandy

Ok - I guess all of you remember last week when I was distraught on Weigh Day.  I had gained all my weight back and just felt basically like crap!  Well - a couple things happened last week.

1 - it rained a lot, so I didn't get to exercise as much as I wanted to.

and 2 - I gave myself a break and didn't really stress out about the weight gain. 

Oh - I pretty much stuck to my plan (except for over the weekend I was kinda cheaty) but No sodas, exercised 3 times, took my vitamin, and ate well and GUESS WHAT...  I lost 6 pounds in the last week!!  The picture above is 5 lbs of fat.  And that is not me holding it (that chick is too skinny to be me).  Do I really think that I lost that much in a week??  NO!  But it just goes to show you how much your weight can fluctuate due to many factors - stress, lack of motivation, lack of encouragement, not exercising, stress eating all add up to a gain or worse they add up to going completely off your program.

I am notorious for saying "screw it, I can't do it, it's too hard, all I ever do is gain...."  And what this has done, is messed up my system to the point that my body doesn't know WHAT to do!!!  Hopefully I will get it back on track.  So for those of you who are counting (see my page at the top) I have lost 6 pounds total and it has been 4 weeks.  That is not a big weight loss - I would like to have had 8 instead of 6 but I think if I stick with it, the results will get better.  Once my body realizes that I am not going to give up.

So, tell me...How was your week???  Leave me some love and encouragement in the form of a comment.  Let me know what you are doing that works and that doesn't...

Weigh Day and Eating Out

By Mandy

So today was my day to weigh in. I did good with eating, and went to the gym, so I was feeling really successful.

But man does that tiny plastic square feel intimidating when it's time to face the music.

The tension in the air was palpable. Music from the show down scenes in the old western movies was playing in my ear as I stepped up. I squinted my eyes closed, took a breath, and looked down....

Ladies and gentleman I am -1 pound! Naturally part of you wants to see -5 every time you get on the scale...but considering how bad I was eating before last week I know it'll take a week or two for my body to come down off the suger/carb high and get back into motion. So I will take that negative pound and run with it. Literally.

Besides weighing in, I wanted to tell you guys about Sunday. My mother's birthday was last week, and so Saturday night my aunt called and said she wanted to take us out to dinner Sunday night. My aunt is the kind of person who will not take no for an answer. An hour spent in her company...and I'm usually trying to eat everything in sight. I was not a happy camper.

Eating out is scary when you're on a diet. Number one...it's just a whole lot of temptation that you don't feel strong enough to deal with. Number two...even if you have self control...finding something healthy to it is horrible. We began scouring the menus of nearby restaurants and all of them had a supposedly 'healthy section' Oh this stuff is under 500 calories, oh this stuff is part of the thin and fit menu!!! But I could not find a single meal at any restaurant I looked at...that didn't have an atrocious amount of sodium and carbohydrates in it.

Luckily, my aunt ended up postponing and we got saved from dinner out. But no matter how dedicated to your diet you are...you can't avoid eating out at some point without looking socially awkward. So I have prepared this mental preparation for eating out. If at all possible...find a menu ahead of time. Find the meal choice with the least amount of calories, carbs, and sodium. It may not be the healthiest choice...but if its the best one you can make in that situation...then I think that still counts as being successful. If you know you're going to be eating out...be extra healthy with your meals for the rest of the day. Have a healthy snack before you leave so that your stomach isn't empty and you don't eat everything on your plate. And try to fit exercise into your day before and/or after the meal.

So that's all from me for now. I'm off to make some veggie juice. I'm trying out a carrot/celery/spinach/apple/strawberry concoction. We'll see how that goes.

I don't get it!

By Sandy

Yes today is weigh day and usually I am happy...

I stayed on my program last week really good.  I turned down milkshakes (even though I really wanted them).  I ate lots of fruits and vegetables.  I ate salads.  I walked 5 out of the 7 days last week.  I did everything right.  I JUMPED out of bed this morning and RAN to the scale.  I couldn't WAIT to weigh.

I gained all of it back.  I am the same weight I was 3 weeks ago.  I lost 4 pounds and gained it all back in 3 weeks and last week was my best week to date.  I don't get it.  Normally I do really good on this kind of program.  Normally I can lose weight.  If I exercise I will lose - if I turn down the stuff I really want I will lose.  But this time - nada.  I not only can't add to my weight loss - but I gained it all back.

Now, I considered very hard in the shower this morning, not telling you.  I thought about just forgetting to post.  Or fudging and telling you that I maintained.  But who is that helping?  I know that you have had times like this when you thought you were doing really good and you got on that scale and were disappointed.  Maybe it wasn't exactly like my experience today, but we have all been upset when we stepped on the bathroom scale.  I know that my body is loving the exercise, because my panties fit better.  I know that I am doing good for my body because my girdle doesn't pinch and make me feel like a stuff sausage.  I know that I am making progress because I can actually tolerate my bra until the end of the day.  So I am going to continue to forge ahead with my program.

I am older than most readers.  I am 44.  So I know that the older we are, our bodies change and losing weight isn't as easy as it once was.  And if I didn't have this blog, I would be tempted to go to McDonalds this morning and say "screw it".  But the fact of the matter is, I promised Mandy that I would do this with her.  And I promised all of you.  And that makes me feel obligated to continue - this is a good thing.  Just by following this blog, you are making me stick to my own program.  Just by being there you are helping me.  So, even if I have to post every Monday a gain, or a maintain, I will continue.  I am hoping this is just bloating or water weight and by exercising and continue to stay on my program I will straighten my body back out.  Leave me some love...I need it today!!

Blooming

We all experience some cold and dark moments in our lives. But no period of life, no matter how frosted and empty, lasts forever. Sooner or later the little buds of hope and happiness push through the layers of sorrow and fear, and they bloom.

I feel like I've bloomed over the past two days. Admitting my defeat in the blog, and then having an honest and heartfelt discussion with the amazing woman we all know as Sandy, helped me a lot more than I expected.

Yesterday I went to the gym. That was quite the experience. On the one hand, it was kind of sad. I remembered when I used to walk into that gym and do an hour and a half workout. How I'd go maximum speed on the machines, how that gym felt like my comfort zone. It felt strange and foreign this time around, but I took a deep breath and reintroduced myself as best I could. 30 minutes were spent on the arcsoft machine...which is kind of like an elliptical, but has a smoother motion to it which is good for people like my mom who have bad knees. It's also the machine you burn the most calories on. I burned 385 calories in 30 minutes. After that I worked on my abs, and god did those machines hurt more then I remembered.

I left feeling exhausted...but in control...strong...decisive. It was a good feeling.

Today I dragged my mother to the grocery store and we did a good healthy food trip. I loaded up on v8, carrots and celery, apples, oranges and bananas, my best bread ever (It's called Arnold's Sandwich thins. I started to get sick of nothing but flat wraps...so this gives you the feel of a fluffy sandwich, but the pieces of bread are sliced thinner so that the top and bottom of your sandwich are the equivalent of one piece of normal wheat bread.) I cooked chicken for dinner. I used to hate chicken cause it always came out so dry, but I found that if you put them in the oven in some Italian dressing they come out nice and moist. A little salsa on the side to dip them in, some spinach leaves, carrots, and soy nuts in my salad...and I was set.

It felt so good to eat my dinner and know that I was putting health into my body. It's funny how much your mindset can make a difference. I'm eating better...and even though I know it's only been a few days, I feel thinner. I'm planning on getting on the scale on Tuesday. I'm going to the gym again tomorrow, and then at least one day on the weekend.

I've also decided to implement motivation techniques to help me say no to temptation. Every time I want to spend money on unhealthy junk food, I'll instead put $5 in my savings box for my trip to florida in July.

So there you have it. There's still a little snow on the ground, but I'm determinedly pushing my way through it.

Confessions

Hello dear friends. I didn't realize it had been so long since I last blogged. I suppose it's easy to lose track of the time when you're hiding, which I have been; hiding from you...trying to hide from myself.

When I started this blog I told myself I would share this journey with you. Failure, success, good days and bad. But actually getting up the nerve to share the bad days with you...is harder than I thought. I grew up in a family where we didn't talk about our feelings. There was occasional bragging about successes, but no discussions of problems or failures. You kept your weaknesses and struggles to yourself. The grown ups didn't like for you to be upset. They would send you off with a cookie or a bowl of ice cream to make you feel better.

So this confession is a hard one. It would be easier to go bury myself in a box of pizza or a pint of ice cream. But I've been doing way too much of that. To say that I have not been eating well...would be an understatement. The amount of pizza, ice cream, and other unhealthy junk I've consumed this past week and a half is shameful. And frightening. It is scary to realize that I have consumed an entire pizza in less than 2 hours....and I still want more. See when I crave...I don't just crave food. I crave the experience of eating...of overeating.

I got on the scale this morning and was amazed to see that I'd only gained a pound. Then again I have achieved a sort of balanced ritual. I'll eat good for a day....then most of the next day, and then I'll go overboard. Then I'll cleanse the next day.

Rinse...repeat.

See...trying to form new habits with the person you've been doing all your bad habits with is hard. Especially when that person is your mom. We get stuck in a circle of dysfunction, as I like to call it. One of us will start with a craving...and the other person will be strong...for a while. Just yesterday my mother was going through the newspaper and a coupon for pizza threw her off. For a whole 2 hours I stayed strong and said no. But the kernel of the idea had been placed in my mind and it was starting to grow. By the time my mom was over the craving I was practically rabid with want. The child in me...doesn't like to feel like the only time we ever eat bad is when she says it's okay. It makes me feel out of control....as if I'm ever in control to begin with...but that's the delusion I give myself. So then I end up talking my mom into the craving all over again.

I find that it's easy to cling to the promise of tomorrow. Tomorrow I'll start fresh, tomorrow I'll get my act together. But tonight I'll have my last hurrah. Tomorrow comes and I find myself saying 'you know...for such and such a reason today doesn't feel like a good day to start. Let's try again tomorrow.' Excuses fly to my tongue faster than I can speak them. I really want to go to the gym...but I'm sick....so I should stay home. 3 hours later it's true that I'm sick...but I'm sitting there chowing down on pizza that I can't even taste. Every excuse I can think up becomes a life raft to which I cling. Why do I do this...when I know that my life raft is leading me right over a deadly cliff?

Is it fear? Uncertainty? Does the answer even matter? Would knowing the whys give me any clue as to the hows of stopping myself? I don't know. Right now I'm awash in a sea of frustration, and self pity. I don't know where my willpower went and I don't know how to find it.

Today is my mom's birthday, and neither of us are feeling extremely festive. But it will feel even more pathetic if we don't do anything. She's trying to decide what we're going to do when I get home. We talked yesterday and decided we need to get our heads together...we need to stop making excuses and start acting. But today is her birthday....what is a birthday without cake? So we're attempting to come up with a game plan that will let us celebrate...but within reason.

For now I'm eating a healthy lunch while I stare out the window at the rain. I feel like I'm looking for the starting line in the pitch blackness of night. If I could find the sun, I could see where I'm going, but I don't even know where to begin to look. My goal is to go to the gym tomorrow after school. Even if it's only 20 mins on the treadmill, at least it's a step in the right direction.

But tonight I will celebrate with my mother. Maybe if I can figure out what it is we're celebrating, I can find the willpower to stop waiting for the next tomorrow.

It's Weigh Day **giggle giggle**

By Sandy

I know I know!!  Sandy, Why do you have a delicious looking burger on a weight loss blog?  WELL, I wanted to show you what 4 pounds looks like and this burger weighs 4 pounds!!

That's right Ladies and Gentlemen (yeah right like we would have any dudes following us) I lost 2 more pounds!!  So Yea!!  That gives me a weight loss of 4 pounds. 

I know 4 pounds is not much, but I am going for a healthy rate of weight loss here and that takes TIME.  We won't always have happy weigh days.  I keep telling myself.  But today is a good one.  This past week, I kept up with my water consumption, did really good on the vitamin every day.  I exercised purposly 3 times.  I didn't always get 5 fruits and vegetables that is something I need to work on.  And I didn't write everyting down (again another challenge).  But I was very mindful of what I was putting in my mouth!!

Let me tell you about something good I tried.  Weight Watchers cream cheese is really delicious and it comes in individual serving cups so there is no guessing.  You know if you eat what's in that cup, it's 2 points.  I also found a website I would like to share.  If you are tracking your points here is an online interactive points calculator that is so easy and it has really helped me:  http://www.webmilhouse.com/pointcalc.php
Of course, weight watchers does not recommend using this points calculator because you need to join their program to keep up with things.  But I am trying to do this without their help this time and I am hoping that you guys will be my meeting. 

So all in all a good week for Sandy.  Don't go out and eat a burger just because I showed you one!!  Please leave me some love in the form of a comment!!  Oh - and you guys let Mandy know that she needs to post and let us know how she's doing!!!  Thank you for reading Across the Miles and Pounds!!

Yea! It's Weigh Day!!

By Sandy

Ok - Weigh Day won't always start off with Yea!  But today it does.  Today is my first weigh in on my program.  I WISH I could tell you that I lost 15 pounds, but the truth of the matter is, I lost 2.  That is a healthy weight loss for a week.  Now, some weeks I will lose more and some weeks I will lose less and some weeks I will gain (but I hope not many).  This week I lost 2 pounds.  I guess you are asking me Sandy, why is there a plate of butter in your post today???  Go ahead - Ask Me!! **giggle**

Well - 4 sticks of butter equals 1 pound.  So, I lost 8 sticks of butter.  That doesn't sound like much really, but let me give you another visual.  What if you took those 8 sticks of butter and smeared them all over your body?  Ewwwwwwwwww right?  Yuck!  Well, basically, what I have done is melt 8 sticks of butter off my body.  This particular weight loss didn't really come from any specific area, and you could argue that it was "just water weight" and I could gain it back tomorrow - and you would be right.  In the beginning we DO lose a lot of water.  That is why it is so important to keep up with the 8 glasses of water per day, because you are losing fluid that is heavy and weighed down with poisons and you want to put clean  beautiful clear water back in it's place.  Did you know that your body is made up of 75% water?  That is really a lot huh?  No wonder water is so important.  If you drink 8 glasses of water a day it will increase memory, it will also help your joints feel better, it will also make your hair, skin and nails look better.  Just plain old water.  So try to drink more water today and less soda - or less sugar sweetened drinks.

Did I do perfect on my plan this week?  NO!!  I didn't exercise everyday, I didn't write down in my journal every day, I didn't get 5 fruits and vegetables every day - but the water, that's what I did do.  And I was conscious of what I was putting in my mouth.  I am trying so hard to go slow.  I tend to jump in with both feet and then get burned out too soon.  I cut out soda this week and I exercised twice - and I lost 2 pounds.  So, just think how FANTASTIC I could have done if I had kept to the program!!!  Oh well, maybe next week.  I am not going to beat myself up for it this week, I am too happy to at least be making progress and you know what else I'm happy about?  YOU!!  That's right, you make the biggest difference in my weight loss by encouraging me and when I see a new follower - I get so EXCITED!!  I get to have another new friend.

I hope you are having a Great Day today!!  Leave me some love in the form of a comment.  I am going to try to stay on task a little better this week.  I HOPE that next week I will have another loss.  Thank you for taking the time to read Across the Miles and Pounds!!

Rough Seas

So this week has been a little harder for me than I foresaw. My plan had been to use this week (which is my spring break off from school) to write a ton, and exercise a ton, and really eat well. See...when I'm at school, my food choices are really limited. Everything I take with me has to be able to last for hours in my backpack without refrigeration and without getting smooshed. So I was excited to be able to take this week to cook my meals fresh and really get my good eating habits rolling.

For the most part I've done okay...when I've been home. All of my friends came home for their spring breaks, you see, and they all wanted to go out and hang. I didn't know how long till I could see them again, so I didn't want to say no. Between socializations and running errands with my mother I've been out of the house a lot, and had to make some out of the house eating habits.

Eating out...is fucking confusing, and hard. Full of temptation. To take the steps to walk to the salad place when it's right next to the pizza place, takes a lot of willpower. I did really good when I was with my mother, because we supported each other. Usually I find out where we're going to eat ahead of time, and look up the menus online and find the healthiest thing I can. It helps cut through temptation when you walk into a restaurant with a gameplan. But last night I didn't do so good. Mostly because I was caught by surprise.

A friend of mine won free tickets to see a musician we both liked. She was under the impression that the show started at 7. But upon arriving at the bar we were informed that the doors didn't even open until 8.30. I'd made sure to eat right before I left, thinking I'd be home around 10 and have time for a glass of v8 or a cup of cottage cheese before bed. My friend and I tried not to get any food. But after a half hour it felt awkward sitting at the bar table with only waters, and watching all the people around us eating made us think we were hungry.

I'm not going to lie here. The bar had healthier choices. There were salads and veggie burgers. I had no excuse. But I wasn't thinking about my diet. I was thinking about how I was soaked from the rain, uncomfortable on the crappy barstool, and annoyed about the time mix-up. It was a perfect storm of emotions and I cracked. I ordered a burger with a side of fries. I did at least take the top of the bun off and eat my burger open-faced. And I only ate half the fries. But they sat heavily in my stomach when my conscious caught up with me later.

I feel like I redeemed myself a little today. I babysat three boys all day, watched them eat breaded chicken patties, and tasty cakes and cheese puffs. I did have a moment of weakness, but it could have been worse than it was. The news about the earthquake and tsunami in Japan hit me very hard. One of my best friends is at the Temple University Campus there. I got a hold of him this morning and he was fine, but then throughout the day there was all this additional information coming in that kept making me really nervous. I had a brought a bag of Quaker Rice Cakes with me, they're a really great low-carb snack, and my nerves lead me to eat the whole bag, which had 3 servings in it. But I guess it was better that I nervously ate my low carb food, than nervously nibbled from the tin of cookies and brownies that were on the kitchen table.

So this week was filled with some rough waves that knocked me around a bit. But what I'm proud about is that I didn't go into self-destruct mode the minute I ate something I shouldn't. That's usually what happens. I'm the model of healthy eating for a month...and then I falter...and instead of picking myself up and saying tomorrow is a new day, I throw a pity party and invite ice cream and pizza along. Not this time. I had a couple bad days, but I will move past them. *Nods with enthusiasm as I take I bite of my baked chicken and carrots*

Mid-Week Checkup

By Sandy - You know, I'm a picture girl.  So I like to add pictures to posts, I think it makes them so much more entertaining and interesting.  When looking for a picture for "Mid-Week Checkup"  I realized that people are really mean to overweight people.  I mean, I have known this all my life, but I have insulated myself against it.  I am a Mommy first and foremost, so I guess I have eyes for kids stuff and I am able to ignore anyone looking at me in a bad way.  Also I have surrounded myself with Church Friends.  Now, I'm not saying that Church people aren't mean - they are human - but they seem to be more accepting than some.  Khevin (my husband) and I go to church most of the time that we are not at home.  So really, the only time I am exposed to people who could be mean to me is if I go to WallMart or the Grocery Store and I never go alone.  I always either have Khevin or my daughter with me.  So I don't experience the nastiness that is out there.  But looking for a picture to use for this post - OMG - I can't believe how heavy women are made fun of and treated.  The pictures I found broke my heart.  If I had to look at those pictures everyday, I might not eat another bite.  Let me take this opportunity to remind you that fat has feelings.  If you touch yourself in your most heavy part you can feel it.  If you cut yourself there it will hurt and if someone is mean to you it is devastating.  I am so Thankful for my online friends who never judge me for appearances.  You guys are just here for me no matter what and that is such a special thing to me!!

Now, Mid-Week - I have done really good with my eating.  I have been very healthy and I have cut down on the sodas a lot!!  I have been drinking water - and Crystal Light iced tea with lemon.  If you like Lemon in your tea, this is really a delicious alternative to soda.  Juice is good - but if you look at the label most juice has a lot of calories.  I haven't been real good about writing my food down.  I think the first time I ate a fig newton I decided I didn't want to write it down.  But I still need to and I will start again RIGHT AWAY.  Writing my food down just gives me an idea of where I am spending my calories and how.  What time of the day I am hungry so I can plan a little better.  Have you noticed that Healthy Food is SO MUCH MORE EXPENSIVE than fast food???  You would think it would be the other way around with this push to get healthy.  Some good snacks I have had - Pear (I love pears), carrots of course, light popcorn (be careful here they get heavy if you aren't paying attention), and bananas.  As you can tell I love fruit.  I have not had hamburger (I had a Greek salad instead), My family and I have eat mostly chicken all week no red meat, and I have been able to say "No" to the girl scout cookies so far.

Exercise - ok here is a challenge.  I want to walk, I love to walk, love it - but it's been raining all week.  I don't have any machines at home and I don't have a gym membership.  What should I do for exercise??  I try dancing - I like that.  Stretching is good too and a little ab work...(yeah I have abs).  But I need something that I can do that I enjoy as much as walking except do it inside.  What do you suggest?  As you can tell, I haven't done a lot of exercise.

I had to go shopping this week.  My boss told me to "Dress Up" for a meeting and I don't have a lot of dressy clothes so off I went to Catherines.  They are the only place around here that has clothes I feel comfortable in.  I really didn't want to buy clothes.  I am in a size 5x.  Yeah that is big - I hate being this size and to have to buy MORE clothes in this size is the pits.  I promised myself no more size 5x - but there I was at Catherines buying more.  I don't want to buy anymore clothes until I can buy a really smaller size.  Here is where your encouragement is needed.  I really felt like crap - and I don't want to be that person anymore.

Anyhoo - that's my week so far.  I REALLY wanted to weigh today to see if I was making progress, but I held off.  I want Monday to be a good day with a healthy amount of weight loss.  I love you for reading mine and Mandy's blog.  Hey Mandy...How was your week?  You Spring Break Silly Sista!!!

Don't Lose Yourself in the Numbers

By Mandy

Yesterday I took out time to make a game plan. I was scared while doing so. This isn't my first attempt at weight loss, and the self defeating voice in the back of my brain is whispering to me that it won't be my last. This time I want to make sure that I learn from my past mistakes with weight loss, and that I do something different. I'll be following a custom diet plan, based on my previous attempts at weight loss and what I know has worked for me. Exercise, at least three times a week. Keep track of what I eat. Lower my carb intake and work on portion control. But within reason.

I say within reason, because when you're looking to lose weight...significant amounts of weight I should say...it's about changing your habits and your lifestyle. So whatever you decide to do for your weightloss plan...should be something you can envision yourself doing for the rest of your life. Quick fixes and temporary changes...will bite you in the ass as soon as you start to feel comfortable. Last year I attempted to lose weight, and successfully dropped 40 pounds. I was going to the gym every night, I was writing down all the nutritional information for everything I ate, I was weighing myself way too often. I lost myself in the numbers, and after a while it became too much and I cracked under the pressure. One day I got on the scale and found I'd gained a pound instead of losing the two I'd been hoping for. I consoled myself with food and it all went downhill from there.

The body is a complicated thing. There is no A+B=C equation to ensure that you'll lose what you want when you want. While seeing a smaller number on the scale can be motivational, we need to remember to take these numbers with a grain of salt. Sometimes muscle may tweak your numbers, or water weight, or some bodily function that is completely beyond your control. Make sure you ask yourself these questions. Did I have a healthy relationship with food today? Did I meet my daily goals? Did I say no to a temptation? Find your success in lots of different places, that way if you don't quite meet your goal in one area, pride in another area can keep you from feeling despairing.

I've decided that I am going to give myself lots of little goals. So my first weight loss checkpoint is as follows. I would like to lose between 30 and 40 pounds by July. I will keep a food journal, but only write down the serving size of food that I ate, not the whole nutritional database. I will weight myself bi-weekly. I will end every day by thinking about my daily successes, no matter how small they might be. Most importantly...I will not lose myself in the numbers...because I am more than that. So are you.

Every Journey

By Sandy

You know they say "Even the Journey of a Thousand Miles Begins with the First Step".  Well, I think that is true.  In order for me to see where I am going and make a plan to get there.  I need to know where I am starting out. 

You know, I think it's funny that I am writing a blog about weight loss.  Because I have struggled with this issue my WHOLE LIFE.  I can remember begging my Mama for a snack and she Insisting that all I could have was an apple.  I didn't want an apple.  I wanted potato chips - because that's what all the other kids were eating.  Why did I have to be the Fat Kid?  Why couldn't I have high metabolism like everyone else?  And this has pretty much been my Mantra my whole life.  "This isn't fair, Why Me - This is Hard, No one else has to do this..."  But the truth is, lots of people have problems controlling their weight and what goes into their mouths.  I am not alone.  And the more we talk and complain about a situation, the worse it looks, until the problem looms larger in our mind than our faith does. 

Today I took the first step to see where I am on my journey.  And the fact of the matter is - I am at the beginning.  The view from atop that scale was not a pretty one, it seems very scary.  The last thing I want to do is fail - while blogging - on the Internet, in front of you.  But I can't really fail, because it's not about reaching the end.  I will be living with myself for the rest of my life.  This journey is about doing something for me - getting healthy - looking better - feeling better and living everyday.  I have a goal - 150 pounds.  And I'd like to reach that in a year.  Can I do it? 

I will be following the Weight Watcher's basic plan.  The one that I have paid to follow so many times.  I will be weighing 1 time per week (on Monday).  I will be drinking 8 glasses of water every day.  I will take a vitamin every day.  I will eat 5 fruits and vegetables everyday.  I will exercise 20 minutes every day (I'm not going to push more that that right now).  And I will be writing down everything I eat and keeping track of my points the best I can.   

I will be charting my success (and my set backs) on my page - see above.  I haven't created the chart yet, but it will be there soon.  I don't know what plan Mandy will be following - but I wanted to detail mine, so when I don't do what I'm supposed to be doing, I can look back and see what I did wrong.  Thank you for following us.  I hope you will find some encouragement and take this journey with us.  Have a Great Day!!!

An Introduction from Mandy

For those who don't know me, my name is Mandy. I'm a little over 2 months away from being 24, going to school as a Psychology major, and I have been overweight all my life. I've dieted successfully two times previously, in 2003 I lost almost 53 pounds. Yet sooner or later I always drifted back to my unhealthy eating habits.

So this time around I was looking for something different. When Sandy suggested we start a blog, I thought maybe that could be the 'something different' that I needed. Though my home of Pennsylvania (you were close with Ohio Sandy) is far away from Sandy, we've found that the support that can be garnered from online friends and communities is amazing.

Part of this blog is about me. It's a place where I can put all my scattered thoughts, my good days and my bad days, down in one place. But it's also about something bigger than just me. I hope to remind everyone who is struggling with weight loss that there is no 'perfect way', no magic quick fix, and it's okay to have a bad day. I want you to know that you are not alone in your journey. I hope that this can be a place where we can support and inspire each other. Two hearts together create more strength than one heart alone. Most of all, as the title of this blog suggests, I want you all to know that this is about more than just numbers. It's about giving ourselves a better quality of life. Because we deserve it.

Welcome! Very First Post! Yea!

This post is written by Sandy and it is somewhat a "test" post.  Mandy and I are friends who live on the other side of the country from each other.  I live in North Carolina and Mandy, I can't remember but I THINK Ohio - - - Mandy help me out here - LOL!  We tweet together a good bit and I know that Mandy is trying to lose weight, something that I want to do as well (so bad) so we decided if we had a place to come and put our thoughts down and get organized as well as encourage each other that maybe we would be MORE sucessful than if we decided to do it ourselves.  I am at the heaviest weight of my life and I am miserable.  I would like very much to NOT be miserable so with a deep breath and lots of hopes for success I am beginning today. 

Mandy has already begun, but I will let her tell you her story.  I know she is beautiful and I love her and I am excited about blogging with her.  If anyone reads our blog they will find out that Mandy is the sweetest person EVER!!! 

Please be patient with us as we move things around and make things better - there are lots of things I would like to add and I would love for this to be a place for you to come to find encouragement, tips and tricks and FRIENDS!!  We can never have too many of those!  It's late - I'm off now.  Love You!!